Think back to the very first time you let your hands, or maybe another object, wander downstairs. That intense, yet curious feeling of that first amazing release was intriguing and thrilling. After that, you most likely had endless nights of fun, obsession, release, pleasure, and some of the best damn fantasies you’ve ever imagined. If you’ve never explored the wonders of your body, you may not be able to relate to what we’re talking about—but right here, right now, we are about to give you some of the best tips for having an explosive, mind-blowing, total body, self-cultivation session. Whether it’s your first time or you’ve been flicking, rubbing and stroking for years. Now let’s go!
It Actually Starts Upstairs…
Contrary to popular belief, the process of desire and arousal actually begins in the brain. Once that switch is flipped, blood flows more rapidly to our genitalia, getting them ready for pleasure and orgasm. Tissue becomes erect in both males and females, thus allowing for better sensation and stimulation. Individual arousal times can differ so don’t put yourself down if it doesn’t happen immediately. Our tip is to use your amazing brain as an arousal asset.
Perhaps you can read some steamy erotica or imagine yourself in a fantasy you really enjoy. We recommend people only use porn as a last resort for arousal because it can create overstimulation. Get your imagination going with some sexy scenes, and since the brain is our most important sexual organ, getting it warmed up first will set the scene for an explosive ending!
Don’t forget the rest…
Woah, Woah, Woah… don’t just go straight for the genitals! You have a ton of hot spots along the way and here’s how to utilize them. A great tip that works for many is to touch and tease yourself the way you would want your perfect lover too. Perhaps you like to have your neck and clavicle caressed, do it! Maybe you want to feel nails gripping your thighs and running up your core, make it happen! This is your chance to rock your body and make love to yourself like no one ever has! This also puts you in a place to create sex and body positivity. Don’t forget, utilizing that sexy brain activity can have an intensely arousing effect. Touch every inch of yourself…except for your naughty spots, which you’ll save for last. Can’t think of an arousing area? Try stimulating some of these popular erogenous zones: scalp, lips, ears, neck, clavicle, inner arms, center of the hands, fingers, stomach, hips, inner thighs, behind the knees, ankles, feet, and toes.
Here it is…the magic
It’s here. Time to take your hands, or the desired object, to your genital pleasure zone. If using a toy, make sure to use some kind of lubrication if there’s too much friction. We know, we know, everyone says “I don’t NEED lube!” It’s true, you may not need lube, but do you want less chaffing, less micro-tearing, less desensitization, and faster orgasms? Then use something to assist the flow. However, your hands always work great for arousal and you’ve got them right there, for free.
One of the best tips for extra explosive power is “edging” or the “stop and start” technique. As you begin to rub, flick, stroke, or massage your fun zone, the feeling of orgasm will build and build. When you get closer to climax, just before you reach it—stop! That’s right, stop, slow down, and breathe that feeling in throughout your entire body. Imagine it as light or energy flowing from the genitals to the tips of your fingers and toes. Then get yourself to that point again, almost over the edge, but not quite; stopping right before climax and allowing your whole body to bask in that feeling. This may be difficult at first, but with practice and self-control, you’re promised some of the best self-cultivation you’ve ever experienced.
Time for the finale
Now, if you’ve built yourself up to a point where you have to release or you’ll lose your mind, that’s when it’s time to let it all out. Surrender to YOUR pleasure. It’s OK, it’s our right as human beings. If you wanna let out screams, moans, or yells—just let it go! (Need Discretion? Put on some music to distract others, and if it distracts you, use earplugs or another device with some jams that get you in the mood). Breathe deeply with each rise, allowing it to wash over your entire body. Do whatever comes naturally to you, regardless whether you think you “look” sexy or not.
This isn’t about looks, it’s about feeling, and when you let yourself experience this pleasure in all its’ glory, it really elevates you in more ways than one. Enjoy it to the fullest. Smile, laugh, cry (happy tears of course); whatever makes you feel great! You and your body deserve this time together. It’s always there for you, worrying about nothing but you, 24/7, 365. Why not reward yourself and your body?!
Benefits of your personal play time
Obviously, this is one of the safest sexual activities. It doesn’t require a partner, which protects you from infections, STDs, and those confusing lust/”love” drives. It can also help reduce sexual dysfunctions, as well as being an amazing stress reliever, headache reducer, and confidence builder. Self-cultivation helps illuminate the types of touches, techniques, or stimulation needed to get you to your desired point of pleasure every time. This way, when you do participate in sex with a partner, getting yourself to that place becomes easier. Plus, not everyone enjoys the same things, so this assists in communicating to your partner exactly what gets you off. After all, it is YOUR orgasm, so it’s up to you to get it! Our favorite benefit of self-cultivation, and perhaps the most important benefit of all, is that it helps you connect with the deeper, more intimate side of yourself. It’s vital for your overall well-being to dedicate time for your personal pleasure and to explore that amazing part of who you are. Every time you do it, you’ll feel happier, healthier, and sexier.
Now…Get to cultivating!
So the next time you find yourself alone and feel like having some personal playtime, try applying a few of the techniques we have outlined here and see how they intensify or shift your pleasure. Remember, you may experience some resistance the first time around, so don’t get frustrated or dismiss this information as superfluous if it doesn’t flow on the first try. Sex is not a one size fits all. It may take some tweaking or tailoring to fit your needs, so allow yourself the time to learn and play with your sexual side. With that said, don’t ever let anyone put you down or make you feel ashamed or broken.
We are all different and that’s totally normal. Sexual pleasure is one of our many human joys. We challenge you to try this for 1 week at least cultivating 3 separate times in the week. Comment with any positive change you notice about yourself from this form of self-love. Start slowly and don’t rush, enjoy it. Use your mental sexual stimuli, breathe deeply and consciously and remind yourself that you absolutely deserve this personal play time. Your body, mind, and soul will thank you for taking the time to love it in such a beautifully arousing and personally stimulating way. So start warming up that brain, bust out the toys, lubes, or other playtime favorites, and have some explosive bedroom lovemaking…with you! ❤